Navel Gazing and Gludgeons

22 08 2008

I picked up the August issue of Vogue last night and found an article written by a woman who remembered the exact date on which she noticed her gludgeons. These are little wads of loose skin where the arm meets torso and that apparently occur with age. I was at first interested in the word ‘gludgeon’ and expected it to be a humorous essay on the humiliating side effects of aging, but it was actually a serious article on surgical options for treating gludgeons. And there are surgical options for those women who feel deeply troubled over a fold of skin at their armpit.

Moving on a few pages, I found an even more serious article about dealing with lumpy knees. And I’m not talking exercise routines. One of the options involves injecting fat dissolving chemicals under the skin along with radio-frequency laser treatments to make the skin around one’s knees positively glow with youth.

I don’t want to be condescending about the whole thing, but it seems to prove my theory that just as soon as we’ve taken care of food and shelter, we’ll navel gaze just long enough to find new things to worry about. So, when we know the utilities and insurance are paid, we’ll worry about whether our shoes are stylish enough, then whether we need new drapes and then whether our knees are lumpy. I’m not sure what comes after that. And I’m not saying it’s wrong, just that it’s fascinating what we find to worry about. And there is always something.

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4 responses

22 08 2008
Mollyavalon

I was thinking today about the word ‘gludgeon’ and how interesting it is that there are at least two English words that rhyme with it: ‘bludgeon’ and ‘dudgeon’.

23 08 2008
Walt

It would be even more interesting to find that there are only two. But I’m too tired to look it up.

23 08 2008
Dale

I think you should examine whether gludeons can be used as an aid in swimming or any other sport. Indeed, this may have been an evolutionary adaption to our foremothers and fathers who lived along the sea. I know my midrift “lifebelt” certainly has some floatation benefits.

10 09 2009
sandrar

Hi! I was surfing and found your blog post… nice! I love your blog. 🙂 Cheers! Sandra. R.

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